Uvalde police had assault rifles, armor and ballistic shields. What else were they waiting for? The invincible star from Mario? pic.twitter.com/e6VXGZNspT – The Daily Show (@TheDailyShow) June 22, 2022 “We already knew they were waiting too long to confront the gunman,” he said, referring to the 70 minutes police spent waiting before storming the classroom where the perpetrator was hiding. “But now we find out they lied that they did not have enough weapons to get inside.” The officers had assault rifles, armor and ballistic shields, “so sorry, what else were they waiting for?” The invincible star from Mario? ” wondered Noah. “How come you don’t come in?” Uvalde police also did not try to break into the police station. The department had previously said police had to wait for a key because the door was locked, but the Texas Department of Public Safety announced Tuesday that the door was never locked. “Did they just never try to open it?” Noah was angry. “It’s ridiculous. Even those waiting outside like a locked bathroom at Starbucks will shake the handle after about two minutes, to be sure. “But it turns out that these cops could not do what it took five minutes for the dinosaurs to learn in Jurassic Park.” The tragic irony, Noah continued, was that “once it was convenient to go with the guns on fire, the police decided to have a picnic outside. But if you are black or you have a broken taillight, then all of a sudden you get a full Rambo. “It’s another reminder that you can not just trust what the police say,” he concluded. “Yes, they are police officers. Yes, you respect them. But that does not mean you trust everything they say after an incident. “What we’ve learned is that cops in America basically use the same principle as toddlers: they’ll tell the truth, but only if it does not get them in trouble.”

Stephen Colbert

At the Late Show, Stephen Colbert repeated the third public hearing by the House Select Committee on January 6, in which spokeswoman Liz Cheney spoke directly to the public at home: “Do not be distracted by politics. This is serious. “We can not let America become a nation of conspiracy theories and violence by criminals.” “It’s true,” said Colbert, “because if we do, the reptiles that rule the new world order will steal our backs to use them as radio towers to transmit our location to Bill Gates.” On Tuesday, the commission listened to Georgia’s Foreign Minister Brad Rafensperger, whom Trump reprimanded in the aftermath of the 2020 election in an hour-long telephone call to overturn the results. “So what are we going to do here, guys? I only need 11,000 votes. “Give me a break,” Trump said. “This is just pathetic,” Colbert said. “He is literally begging them to invent votes for him. It’s like seeing an old man trying to figure out an extra pancake at Denny’s – “What are we doing here, guys?” I just need one more pancake, guys. And then I got a grand slam. Just put some slots in there, give me a break. “Give me a break – and the state of Georgia.” The commission also produced text messages between a Pence aide and an aide to Sen. Ron Johnson, in which the two discuss a list of potential fake voters. “What I saw when I saw it this afternoon was that the chain of traitors just started with ‘sup?’” Colbert said. “It’s a very loose way to overthrow democracy. ‘Sip? OMG, let’s sit down 8 alternative voters for lolz! ‘»

Seth Meyers

And on Late Night, Seth Meyers quoted former Vice President Mike Pence in a new interview in which he said that after the Jan. 6 attack on the Capitol, he and Trump “talked” and then rolled up their sleeves and finished cooperation”. “I do not buy it,” Meyers said. “The only way Trump rolled up his sleeves was to sell a fake Rolex.” Pence also said he would always be proud to have served with Trump, “because in the end, there is no stronger bond than Stockholm Syndrome,” Meyers said. Trump, meanwhile, has said he has not asked Florida Gov. Ron de Sandis if he is running for president in 2024, but believes he would defeat him. “Well, there’s only one way to find out,” Meyers said, Republican Party and all that you support until there is only one man left in the GOP to really run in the election: Jeb! “A rare applause for Jeb,” he said over a photo of his younger brother Bush, whose campaign fell short of the start of the 2016 GOP qualifiers.