This was Saps in the most unlikely situation. Excessive enthusiasm poured out of every resource. Somewhere in his head he has calculated that the strikes are good for the government. That what the public really wants is another wedge issue that divides the nation. Battle with the unions. Somehow he is convinced that after three days of unrest, people will say, “You know what? The strikes have nothing to do with the Tories. After all, he is only 12 years in government. I tell you who I blame. “I blame the opposition.” These are delusional things. There again, he was always fantastic. Hard to believe that someone with a checkered career record could reach the cabinet. But Boris Johnson likes to appoint people with his own image. Ministers with their own indifference to the truth. Saps has been in a hurry since the beginning of his statement to the Commons. He felt like a son of Jesus. It is pumped. Ready to fight with any member of the Labor Party. He ran to throw some red meat at the few Tory fans who had arrived in the hall. Apparently the others decided to work from home. Again, so few of them show up regularly anyway, it will be a normal work week for them. Saps was the first to join the unions. “Barons of the Union,” he smiled, as if shouting the name of an evil one. We could almost have gone back to the ’70s. Except this time there would be no winter of resentment. Rather a summer of resentment, though Grant seemed far from displeased. He was excited about himself. Excited by the chaos that had been caused. Excited to be in the spotlight. “We are doing the best we can,” he continued. As much as possible to be misleading. to tell half truths? to accuse the railway union of the same practices he was guilty of. He was not the employer. This was Network Rail and the train operators. So it was right that he was left out of all the negotiations. It seemed out of his mind that the government actually owned most of these companies and they could not reach a pay deal without saying so. But no. Saps was not ashamed of how little effort he had put into helping to resolve the dispute. It was very right that he had done almost nothing. In fact, the less he did, the more he proved how cooperative he was. No one wanted these blows less than him, he lied. “Everyone wanted a decent salary increase,” he continued. Only the dispute was not about money, he insisted. Something that will be news for many of those who are on strike. It concerned terms and conditions. And by the way, the revenue was reduced by 20% from the pandemic, so the strikers could whistle for cash. Not that it was for the money. The shadow transport secretary, Louise Hay, was at her best. A channel of fair anger. He really did not want the strikes to proceed either, but he respected the right of the unions to strike. It was called the democratic process. And he knew where most of the responsibility lay. With Saps himself. The minister who was lost in action. The man who had done the most to ensure that the strikes would proceed with his unpretentious approach to industrial action. How could he barely lift a finger? Only employers should be instructed to negotiate at the last possible moment. It was a serious omission. Leadership failure. The talks were just a scam. Adjustment for failure. Saps stretched out his hands in a show of false innocence. Haye pressed. How was it that he now proposed to use the same P&O manual to attract cheaper employees to agencies he condemned just a few months ago? The Labor government in Wales had reached an agreement with the unions and there would be no strikes there. Why couldn’t he do the same? Saps hastened to praise the railway workers who continued to work during the pandemic, now he had turned to them. What if something had happened to the convict’s high-wage economy? This clearly depended on who had the highest profits. Saps was not moved. Nothing was going to ruin his day. Now not everything was in place. So he kept bouncing up and down with enthusiasm. The strikes were bad. Attack on the country. The unions had done nothing but lie. He had submitted a salary proposal. Much less than inflation. And it was not his fault if the government had no plans to deal with it. And the railways were not already paid too much? The nurses were getting much less – though not less than the cleaners and catering staff – so the unions should just shut up. Obviously the poor pay of other employees was an incentive. “I love railways,” Saps concluded. It just has a funny way of showing it.
